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Monday, June 27, 2011

Reverence At Prayer

We must know that God regards our purity of heart and tears of compunction, not our many words. RB80.20.3

Purity of heart....that has been my major life desire since youth. For me, purity of heart is a combination of authenticity, sincerity, integrity and radical honesty. Those are all virtues that I strive for in my life and that I value in my relationships with others. But, how can I live fully engaged with life in this way fully? That has been my eternal question.

The second part of this verse--shedding tears of compunction in prayer seems to be the key to this query. Tears have always been a part of my life but they have never really been my friends. I do not enjoy showing that extremely vulnerable part of myself that is moved to tears by compassion, love, sadness, anger and even joy. I would really much rather spend my life being invulnerable and self-sufficient.

Today's reading invites me to put aside my veneer of composure and risk being human--fully human in the face of God and others. Life does not call me to be involunerable.

How am I living in truth with God today?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Single-Heartedness

Teach me, Lord, your way that I may walk in your truth, single-hearted and revering your name. Ps. 86.11

One of my life-long prayers has been for a steadfast heart that is focused on God. Granted, this is definitely an ideal that is not likely to be reached during my lifetime yet I continue to pray daily for the grace of that purity of heart.

This single-hearted path is not one that comes casually, as in I wake up one morning and find myself suddenly transformed into a true model of faith. It is my life's task here within this community of monastic women. Ultimately, we all share the same journey and desire but it is also the work of the individual.

So...how do I achieve this in my life?

One thing I do is plan time at the beginning and end of my day to review my choices and actions of the day. I thank God for the good and seek God's grace to do better in the future. In a sense, I try to reaffirm my desire for fullness and holiness daily.

How can I be more aligned with God's will today?

Please join our monastic community in prayer as we celebrate the Jubilees of Monastic Profession of Sister Mary Cabrini Boland (70 years), Sister Mary Michael Schwarz (70 years), Sister Christine Ereiser, Prioress St. Joseph Monastery (25 years), and Sister Catherine Martinez (25 years)).

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

God Come to my Assistance

Our community prayers begin daily with the following verse: O God, come to my assistance. O Lord, make haste to help me. Everytime we gather as a group to pray we call on God's grace and mercy to be with us at that time.

This refrain doesn't just carry me through that prayer period, it helps me to remember at random times throughout the day that God is always present and ready to help. I just need to remember to call. That simple reminder, which really does nothing to change who God is, gives me the confidence I need to move forward in the day.

Being a person who thrives on being self-sufficient, I often forget to ask for help. This little verse reminds me daily who my real source of power is.

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Monday, June 20, 2011

An Attitude of Praise

The Prophet says: Seven times a day have I praised you (Ps 118[119]:164). RB80.16.1

Verse 1 of this chapter invites us to praise God seven times daily. If taken literally that would mean praying every three hours or so throughout the day. This invitation to prayer can also be seen as Benedict's reminder that the life of the faithful person needs to be rooted in a relationship with God. It is that constant connection which provides the graces and strength needed to face whatever the day might bring.

The early Christian community was familiar with this concept and developed ways to maintain that centeredness on God throughout the day. From this came the invocation of the name of Jesus which reminds us both of the power of the Name of God and keeps us connected in prayer in a very simple yet effective way.

I know that if I can start my day remembering God and my many blessings and continue to call on him during the empty spaces in my day, I am much more focused, present, and aware of the world around me. I find myself being more closely connected with life and more awake to the subtleties that I often miss. This awareness and connection is what I desire daily for myself.

How can I be more aware of God's presence in my life today?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Rising for the Glory Be

We are preparing to celebrate the great feast in honor of the Holy Trinity. On this feast we acknowledge the great mystery that God is Three--yet--One. Although there is only One God (One Person) there are three distinct roles within the One. In a sense, God is the first model of community available to us.

During the Liturgy of the Hours (Divine Office), we traditionally stand and bow during the Doxology (Glory Be) at the conclusion of the psalms and the Benedictus and Magnificat (Gospel Canticles during prayer). We bow out of reverence to our Triune God and in acknowledgement of the wonder of the great mystery before which we stand and live.

There are countless times during my day when I stand before the presence of God in my ordinary encounters. If I truly believe that God exists within the heart of each person I meet and within each moment of my life, my day could be a perpetual bow to the presence of God in everything. Since this is not physically possible or practical, I need to work on cultivating an interior attitude which speaks of this reality. It needs to be an intention effort on my part. If I choose to live this reality, I might find myself more compassionate, accepting and a whole lot less stressed.

What small things can I do today to engender that attitude within my soul?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Monday, June 13, 2011

Living the Scriptures

The readings from the Rule at this point address community prayer--how the prayer is to be structured, what psalms are recited at each hour, all the practical aspects of praying as a group.

One of the things that strikes me from our passage from Chapter 10 of the Rule (today's selection) is the mention of the reading from Scripture being recited by heart. I happen to have a good memory and find memorizing selections from literature fairly easy. In order for me to be able to memorize and recite a piece fluidly, I need to make the passage part of who I am. I need to develop a relationship with it and incorporate it into my daily life.

That is what ideally should happen to my from praying the psalms daily and from my personal lectio. After engaging with Scripture daily over a period of time, whether 5 years, 50, 70 or a lifetime, ideally my own life would be a version of the Scripture....a vibrant retelling of God's message of love to the world.

I need to ask myself regularly: is the Gospel message that I am living authentic and life-giving? Is it the message that will attract others to follow Christ and to consider living our monastic way of life?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Being Blown by the Wind

...A talkative man goes about aimlessly on earth (Ps 139[140].12). RB80.7.58

I love to chatter...I could call it talking but truthfully it is mostly chattering; just something to do to keep myself entertained.

There are some benefits to this skill. For example, I am a great storyteller, which comes in handy when entertaining a group. I also feel comfortable speaking extemporaneously--I think quite well on my feet and can keep things going without too many awkward pauses. I come by this skill naturally and grew up in a home which was rarely without some sort of banter or communication.

There are instances where this skill can be a hindrance rather than an asset.


  • One aspect of life which can be difficult is that sometimes I am not taken very seriously. I can spend so much time focused on just "talking" that at times I can come off looking pretty shallow and superficial.

  • I have had to work a little harder than most to develop an authentic appreciation for silence, quiet and stillness. I have always longed for silence and been intrigued by it have had to consciously learn how to still myself enough to just be.

  • As I mature, I have also come to realize that silence and stillness are essential for my own spiritual growth. This stillness helps me to focus and to strengthen my relationships with God and with others.

I long for a time when I will not feel so much feel as a leaf being blown by a restless wind but more like a rooted plant that is able to sway with the gentle breeze of God's love.


Sr. Catherine, OSB



Monday, June 6, 2011

No Need To Be a Superstar

The eighth step of humility is that a monk does only what is endorsed by the common rule of the monastery and the example set by this superiors. RB80.7.55

I have a tendency to want to be the center of the universe always. This fact is blatantly obvious to most who have known me for very long.

The eighth step of humility, though, encourages me to consider the benefits which are available to those who are willing to be one of the group. I am challenged to be open to the fact that the group's wellbeing as well as the community wisdom might be more in tune with God's will for me. I do not have the answer to all issues. And as bright as I might be I am not always a fountain of wisdom and truth.

Sometimes that is hard for me to understand and accept. Afterall, I love doing things my way so why shouldn't I invite others to do things my way also? I need to remember that part of being a good community member is faithfulness to the common practices and support for the common good. Ultimately, what is good for the group will be good for me also. I just need to remember that.

Today's question for me is: What am I doing to build up community spirit and bonds?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Friday, June 3, 2011

Let the Truth Come to Light

The fifth step of humility is that a man does not conceal from his abbot any sinful thoughts entering his heart, or any wrongs committed in secret, but rather confesses them humbly. RB80.7.44

There is a blessing in being a person who is so extroverted that there are few thoughts that cross my mind, actions committed or opinions held that my whole known world does not know about in it's entirety. The expression TMI (too much information:)) seems to have be formulated with me in mind.

While it can be a curse at times--as in I often find myself saying more than I should multiple times a day, it is also a great blessing and source of growth for me if used properly. It is a way for me to be able to hold myself accountable for my growth and to take responsibility for my missteps. Since I am a person that thrives on being super successful (if not perfect), I often find myself reflecting on my past actions and thoughts and striving always to improve and continue on the road that leads to God.

Since I am also a very social being, I try as much as possible to curb my attitudes and behaviors and make them at least be as consistent as possible with my own belief system and my values. It helps that I have tons of energy and do not believe in half measures of anything.

A question that I ask myself often is: Would I be embarrassed if others knew this about me? It helps keep me honest and sincere in life.

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Overcoming Through Love

They are so confident in their expectation of reward from God that they continue joyfully and say, 'But in all this we overcome because of him who so greatly loved us' (Rom. 8:37). RB80.7.39

In addressing the fourth step of humility (obedience under difficult, unfavorable, or even unjust conditions), Benedict brings out the idea that it is the love of God which permits us to face adversity and overcome hardships that come in life.

Love is the key to many of life's more difficult moments, God's love for us which brought us to life initially, the assurance of God's sacrificial love, which is present in Christ's victory on the cross, and God's loving care which carries us through life.

My response of love to God is also present at times of transition when I choose to open myself in love to God's gift of grace rather than continue along my own path which might appear more comfortable but is not necessarily the most life-giving option for me.

The love and support of my personal support system is another factor which helps to make my life more enjoyable. God created me to be able to live the fullness of life and happiness.

How am I contributing to the peace and joy of others today?

Sr. Catherine, OSB