Being lukewarm...that is not an appealing image. In general, things should either be truly hot or truly cold. It is a sign of total commitment to whatever is being considered. Lukewarmness is more like sitting on the fence because I can't get up enough energy to care one way or the other about an issue. It is neutrality--but not in a good sense. It is closer to apathy than detachment.
I have never considered myself lukewarm about anything in life until recently. For me, this state of not caring can be instructive. When I find myself not really caring about life, myself, or other things, it is a good time to start paying attention to my thoughts, my attitudes and my current pastimes. If I am careful, I can trace back the beginnings of this state of nothingness in my daily life. It is usually not anything large and flashing rather tiny, subtle decisions that eat away at my spirit little by little. I don't want to reside in this state for long (if at all).
Today's task is to pull myself back from lukewarmness and fully engage in life. What can I do to recommit to that is important for me in life?
Sr. Catherine, OSB
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Acknowledging the Holy Trinity
We believe in a God who is Three-yet-One. Our God is three distinct persons (Father, Son, Holy Spirit) yet one divine Being. This part of our faith is a mystery. We will never fully understand it but we are invited to accept it as true in faith.
We live in the presence of this mystery. One of the visible ways in which we show our awareness of this reality and also our reverence to the Holy Trinity is the monastic custom of standing and bowing at the Doxology during our times of common prayer. It reemphasizes the reality of God's presence in our prayer together and in daily life in general.
What are some ways in which I can live my daily life in reverence to the Trinity?
Sr. Catherine
We live in the presence of this mystery. One of the visible ways in which we show our awareness of this reality and also our reverence to the Holy Trinity is the monastic custom of standing and bowing at the Doxology during our times of common prayer. It reemphasizes the reality of God's presence in our prayer together and in daily life in general.
What are some ways in which I can live my daily life in reverence to the Trinity?
Sr. Catherine
Friday, October 7, 2011
Silence and Humility
When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is prudent. Prov 10:19
The ninth step of humility encourages us to treasure silence. Silence is valued because it allows me to slow down my thoughts and to listen for God's voice in my daily experiences.
God speaks in subtle and quiet ways. When I am busy talking incessantly, thinking about what amazing remark I will make next, I find that I do not have the sensitivity necessary to perceive God's messages to me. I lose my ability to listen to God, others, and the world around me when I am occupied with only my own speech and concerns. When I am so focused on what I have to say and on my message, I often discover that it is harder to speak the truth gently and respectfully. I am in danger of playing with the truth or hurting another thoughtlessly if I am not careful.
Restraint of speech invites me to listen carefully and to think before I speak--something that I can easily forget to do. I do not need to share every thought or impulse that passes through my mind. I do not always need to be the center of attention or the greatest conversationalist. It is okay to sit back, listen, and reflect once in a while. As the book of Proverbs reminds us today, the prudent person (the wise and mature person) restrains their lips. That does not mean that they never speak but rather that speech follows reflection and thought. This restraint makes the person's words more valuable.
May I continue to grow in my restraint of speech and my appreciation of silence.
Sr. Catherine, OSB
The ninth step of humility encourages us to treasure silence. Silence is valued because it allows me to slow down my thoughts and to listen for God's voice in my daily experiences.
God speaks in subtle and quiet ways. When I am busy talking incessantly, thinking about what amazing remark I will make next, I find that I do not have the sensitivity necessary to perceive God's messages to me. I lose my ability to listen to God, others, and the world around me when I am occupied with only my own speech and concerns. When I am so focused on what I have to say and on my message, I often discover that it is harder to speak the truth gently and respectfully. I am in danger of playing with the truth or hurting another thoughtlessly if I am not careful.
Restraint of speech invites me to listen carefully and to think before I speak--something that I can easily forget to do. I do not need to share every thought or impulse that passes through my mind. I do not always need to be the center of attention or the greatest conversationalist. It is okay to sit back, listen, and reflect once in a while. As the book of Proverbs reminds us today, the prudent person (the wise and mature person) restrains their lips. That does not mean that they never speak but rather that speech follows reflection and thought. This restraint makes the person's words more valuable.
May I continue to grow in my restraint of speech and my appreciation of silence.
Sr. Catherine, OSB
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Humility--Facing Truth
It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn thy statutes. The law of thy mouth is better to me than thousands of gold and silver pieces. Thy hands have made and fashioned me; give me understanding that I may learn thy commandments. RSV.Ps 119.71-73
Humility invites me to face the truth about myself. There are many times when I would prefer to remain in my fantasy that I am in control of my life and destiny. The fiction that I am a self-made person able to maneuver successfully through life by myself. At these times, it seems as though MYSELF is all I need in this world.
In reality, though, I know a different truth. I am not self-sufficient. And I am rarely in control of anything...even when I think I am. I am both dependent and interdependent.
Humility invites me to face the truth about myself. There are many times when I would prefer to remain in my fantasy that I am in control of my life and destiny. The fiction that I am a self-made person able to maneuver successfully through life by myself. At these times, it seems as though MYSELF is all I need in this world.
In reality, though, I know a different truth. I am not self-sufficient. And I am rarely in control of anything...even when I think I am. I am both dependent and interdependent.
- I am interdependent on others. I need others to help me think, to keep me honest and accountable, to balance me back into reality at times. I also need others to encourage me to stretch beyond what I might normally want to do.
- I am dependent on God. Without God's love and mercy, I would cease to be. It is God's grace that allows me to experience any success or accomplishments I might achieve. All of life is pure gift from God.
Psalm 119. 71-73 (referenced in RB80.7.54) speak of the good that comes from learning humility through life. It is in realizing my dependence on God and interdependence on others that I am able to practice righteous living in the world. It is through acknowledging that I do not have all the answers or that I am not the expert on everything that I learn to listen to the wisdom of God and others and to be open to diversity. Everyone does not always have to see things my way. In recognizing my dependence on God, I learn how to live the commandments authentically in my life.
What am I doing today to remain open to God's voice in my life?
Sr. Catherine, OSB
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
True Humility
The sixth step of humility is that a monk is content with the lowest and most menial treatment, and regards himself as a poor and worthless workman in whatever task he is given, saying to himself with the Prophet: I am insignificant and ignorant, no better than a beast before you, yet I am with you always (Ps 72[73]:22-23). RB80.7.49-50
Humility deals with the truth. It is the awareness of who I am without much pretense. It is an acknowledgement that in the great scheme of things I fall somewhere in the middle of the pile. I am not the best or the worst, the first or the last. In a sense, I am with everyone else in the middle somewhere...and that is really okay. My identity and worth is not necessarily attached to being #1 all of the time. It is actually freeing to just be with everyone else.
This is not a vote for mediocrity. It is just an awareness that it is only through God's grace that I possess skills, talents, and life. It is God's gift and constant Presence that allow me to be successful in my endeavors. All of my accomplishments are actually due to God's love and mercy.
The passage from Psalm 72[73] which concludes today's reading recalls the reality of God's constant presence and guidance in daily life. In the RSV Bible, verse 23 speaks not only of God's presence but also that God holds me by the hand--in a sense, leading me along the paths of life. This thought is comforting since it seems to say that if I am willing to let God lead me through life (rather than fight for an illusion of control) God will be there--not just sometimes but all of the time. What more could I ask for?
May I continue to grow in my awareness of God's presence in my daily life.
Sr. Catherine, OSB
Humility deals with the truth. It is the awareness of who I am without much pretense. It is an acknowledgement that in the great scheme of things I fall somewhere in the middle of the pile. I am not the best or the worst, the first or the last. In a sense, I am with everyone else in the middle somewhere...and that is really okay. My identity and worth is not necessarily attached to being #1 all of the time. It is actually freeing to just be with everyone else.
This is not a vote for mediocrity. It is just an awareness that it is only through God's grace that I possess skills, talents, and life. It is God's gift and constant Presence that allow me to be successful in my endeavors. All of my accomplishments are actually due to God's love and mercy.
The passage from Psalm 72[73] which concludes today's reading recalls the reality of God's constant presence and guidance in daily life. In the RSV Bible, verse 23 speaks not only of God's presence but also that God holds me by the hand--in a sense, leading me along the paths of life. This thought is comforting since it seems to say that if I am willing to let God lead me through life (rather than fight for an illusion of control) God will be there--not just sometimes but all of the time. What more could I ask for?
May I continue to grow in my awareness of God's presence in my daily life.
Sr. Catherine, OSB
Monday, October 3, 2011
On Being Accountable
The fifth step of humility is that a man does not conceal from his abbot any sinful thoughts entering his heart, or any wrongs committed in secret, but rather confesses them humbly. RB80.7.44
Manifestation of thoughts (exagoreusis) is the ancient custom of revealing all thoughts, impulses and emotions present in one's consciousness. It is the way in which a sincere seeker could bring out hidden inclinations to be observed and if necessary eradicated. It was a way in which tendencies and impulses could be assessed before they became either sin, passions or ingrained patterns of being.
Although I was unfamiliar with the concept until after entered our community, I grew up with a sense of something similar to this practice. During adolescence, I discovered that a multitude of thoughts seemed always be traveling through my head. It was often easy for me to obsess on my thoughts--sometimes to the point of not being able to break the hold of these thoughts. The only thing that seemed to relieve some of my more insistent ideas was to find a trusted person to tell these obsessive thoughts to--or write them down if no one suitable was available.
What these actions did was get the thoughts outside of myself and allow me to look at them a little more objectively. I could separate from the confusion in my mind and see more clearly the direction toward which this chain of thinking was leading me. It also gave an ability to stop before I acted impulsively at times. Another benefit that I found in this getting stuff out of my brain was that if I could see it more clearly, I could also come up with an action plan that might help me avoid future problems. In a sense, it gave me the ability to be accountable. If a particularly troublesome idea kept emerging, I could make plans to stop it earlier in the future.
One of the new insights I received through this process was that the thoughts that I could either write down or share with another were less likely to present themselves again as readily. In a sense, if I knew that I was going to have to be accountable for the same impulse sometime soon I was less likely to fall prey to it. That is one of the benefits to the concept of manifestation of thoughts...there is an accountability factor that takes hold.
Today, I am grateful for the many ways in which I can grow in my self-knowledge and on my path to holiness.
Sr. Catherine, OSB
Manifestation of thoughts (exagoreusis) is the ancient custom of revealing all thoughts, impulses and emotions present in one's consciousness. It is the way in which a sincere seeker could bring out hidden inclinations to be observed and if necessary eradicated. It was a way in which tendencies and impulses could be assessed before they became either sin, passions or ingrained patterns of being.
Although I was unfamiliar with the concept until after entered our community, I grew up with a sense of something similar to this practice. During adolescence, I discovered that a multitude of thoughts seemed always be traveling through my head. It was often easy for me to obsess on my thoughts--sometimes to the point of not being able to break the hold of these thoughts. The only thing that seemed to relieve some of my more insistent ideas was to find a trusted person to tell these obsessive thoughts to--or write them down if no one suitable was available.
What these actions did was get the thoughts outside of myself and allow me to look at them a little more objectively. I could separate from the confusion in my mind and see more clearly the direction toward which this chain of thinking was leading me. It also gave an ability to stop before I acted impulsively at times. Another benefit that I found in this getting stuff out of my brain was that if I could see it more clearly, I could also come up with an action plan that might help me avoid future problems. In a sense, it gave me the ability to be accountable. If a particularly troublesome idea kept emerging, I could make plans to stop it earlier in the future.
One of the new insights I received through this process was that the thoughts that I could either write down or share with another were less likely to present themselves again as readily. In a sense, if I knew that I was going to have to be accountable for the same impulse sometime soon I was less likely to fall prey to it. That is one of the benefits to the concept of manifestation of thoughts...there is an accountability factor that takes hold.
Today, I am grateful for the many ways in which I can grow in my self-knowledge and on my path to holiness.
Sr. Catherine, OSB
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