Preparing for the Battle

I am a pacifist at heart. I do try to put on a strong front and a tough exterior many times but I really do believe and pray for peace daily. So, then, how do I deal with the military language that is presented at the begining of the Rule? After all, with words like truce and battle most true pacifists would probably have stopped reading the Rule by now, right?

The battle that we are preparing for is the struggle against our ego, our self-will, our dark side, the sin in our lives. That can feel like an internal war at times. I know that although I am basically a good person and strive to do the right thing, there are times when the wrong thing or the mediocre thing seems more appealing because it is the easiest or the most comfortable. Sometimes I might choose the wrong thing just because I am tired or don't really care that day. That is part of being human.

I still strive though to grow daily. That requires vigilance, training, focus and goal setting so that I know how to be prepared at the time when I need to make a quick choice. So it is not so much that I want to do battle and enjoy the military imagery but that there is a real battle going on against myself and toward God.

I do want to be part of that war so that at the end of my life I can look around and find myself with my community at God's side.

Sr. Catherine