Providing Choices

It is often easier to get folks to agree to things if they are given some choice and voice in the matter. Today, Benedict talks to us about the food to be provided at meals. He recommends that two cooked options be available at meals so that those who may not choose one entree would still have another option available. Once again St. Benedict's wisdom and familiarity with human nature is shown since he realized that not everything in a person's life needs to be legislated and that in some cases some choice even a small one might be beneficial.

I can really appreciate this thinking in a very practical way in my life. Growing up I was an extremely picky eater. The list of non-edible foods was much longer than the list of acceptable ones. I never went hungry for long so I must have found some things that I liked. As I grew and began having more of a social life, my parents helped me to realize that while pickiness might be mildly accepted at home it was totally unacceptable in other's homes and in public. I could choose to widen my eating experience and have plenty of opportunities to grow or I could remain how I was and have many less options. It did not take me long to acquire a taste so some things that I would never have thought I could stomach.

The same applies for me in many other instances. How can I offer others choices so that they may grow to their potential?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Don't Overkill

There ought to be due proportion between the seriousness of a fault and the measure of excommunication or discipline. RB80.24.1

This short verse from the Rule seems to be pretty clear: make sure that the consequence is in proportion to the action. The reasoning behind it makes sense and seems fair--big penalties should not be associated with minor infractions. Both the severity of the action and the particular situation of the person(s) involved should be considered.

This theory holds true in any kind of group whether a family, a team, a classroom or an office. I am reminded of an incident that happened at home with my siblings. My younger sister did not have a whole lot of emotional control as far as I could see. (I had somehow forgotten that I was more than 15 years older than her, so hopefully I had a little more control than she did.) One day she was upset about something and threw a hairbrush at me. She was about two at the time. I was not going to let this offense go by lightly so I flung the brush back at her. She had totally missed me but I had better aim. I hit her on the head. My mom happened to be coming into the room about the time the brush hit my sister. Needless to say, I got in trouble for not using my best judgement in responding to my sister. I had forgotten about the difference in age and strength between us.

I remember that incident when I am in a situation where I need to evaluate how to respond to an action. Do I really need to respond in like manner? Is my proposed consequence disproportionate to the original offense? How would I like others to respond to me in that situation? How forgiving would I like God to be with me?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

In the Presence of God and His Angels

Let us consider, then, how we ought to behave in the presence of God and his angels, and let us stand to sing the psalms in such a way that our minds are in harmony with our voices. RB80.19.6-7

I have a very short attention span and often find my mind drifting in multiple directions if I don't consciously make myself focus and be fully present. After saying this, today's passage from the Rule is more than a little challenging for me at times.

I have been in our community around 25 years. That means that for 25 years I have been participating in our community prayers daily. I can even recite many of the psalms, practically in my sleep. That is where the challenge lies for me...It is possible for me to be physically present at our prayers, and even be mouthing the correct words and not be totally present! My mind could easily be on my last activity or my next activity if I am not watchful.

My basic underlying desire, though, invites me to be awake, alert and fully present at our times of prayer. So knowing my own tendencies, how can I ensure that I am as fully engaged as possible at all times?

• I can arrive a few minutes early for prayers and prepare myself in stillness and silence to be fully present.
• I can make sure that I reduce my distractions by refraining from stopping along the way to the oratory.
• I can bring myself gently back to the present moment when I find myself daydreaming.
• I can thank God for the grace to even have this desire for heightened awareness.

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Teaching by Example

Furthermore, anyone who receives the name of abbot is to lead his disciples by a twofold teaching: he must point out to them all that is good and holy more by example than by words, proposing the commandments of the Lord to receptive disciples with words, but demonstrating God's instructions to the stubborn and the dull by a living example. RB80.2.11-12

We have all heard it said that actions speak louder than words. Today, Benedict takes a similar approach when addressing the leader about teaching God's ways. To those who are docile and agreeable teach through words; for those who might be more resistant teach through the example of your life--be a role model for others for the good.

When I was younger, I remember someone telling me once that I could take any of my elders as a role model--they could either show me what to do to have a happy and successful life or I could learn what not to do by learning from the mistakes of others. The choice is totally mine whether to follow the good example of others or the misguided example. I can choose my destiny everyday.

That idea has stuck with me as I have matured in community. It has also occurred to me that I can be that same kind of role model for others also. Do I want to be a model for the good of community or a model of what not to do?

I pray for the grace to consistently be a model of good and virtue. What kind of model am I today?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

The Gospel--A Guide for the Journey

Clothed then with faith and the performance of good works, let us set out on our way, with the Gospel for our guide, that we may deserve to see him who has called us to his kingdom (1Thess 2:12). RB80.Prologue.21

It is important to have a good plan and a good map when setting out on a journey. As we begin another cycle of the reading of the Rule of Benedict, it is necessary to have a road map also.

Benedict fills his short Rule with a multitude of allusions to scripture. He uses these references as freely as many of us use regional expressions or idioms in daily speech. He intends for his followers to be that familiar with the Bible also...especially wisdom literature.

I enjoy travelling so I can relate to the need for a trustworthy map or at least a good compass to help orient me in my daily journeys. That map can be pretty worthless if I do not understand the symbols it contains or it's information. In that same way, I need to become so familiar with the Scriptures that they become part of who I am. I need to take the time to allow these beautiful passages to become more than just mere words to know and memorize but words to live by.

What am I doing to allow God's word more space in my life today?

Visiting Monastics

A visiting monk from far away will perhaps present himself and wish to stay as a guest in the monastery. Provided that he is content with the life as he finds it, and does not make excessive demands that upset the monastery, but is simply content with what he finds, he should be received for as long as he wishes.

Visitors should not make themselves a burden.

When I was young, I learned that if I wanted to be socially accepted or even just invited places, I needed to make sure that I was a pleasant guest. If I was too demanding or bothersome, I might find myself never invited anywhere. I learned this lesson fairly rapidly and learned it well.

My parents were always amazed that I seemed to be a much different person at friend's homes as opposed to my "at home" behavior. I was polite and courteous. I was not picky or as obnoxious. I even offered to do some tasks that I would never have done willingly at home. My friends were that way at my home also. Just being a guest in someone else's home seemed to make the difference.

Benedict addresses the issue of guests today. He supports his disciples visiting other groups as long as they are not overly-burdensome.

I need to develope some of those "away from home skills" more fully so that they become a part of my daily life. How can I make life at home more pleasant for myself and others?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Compassion for the Needy

Chapters 36 and 37 of the Rule (yesterday's chapter and today's) deal with the compassion that needs to be shown to those among us with special needs. We are all among the needy at different times whether through illness, age, strength, or personal weakness. There are always some among us that need our love in a special way.

This reality is something that I need to remember daily. Being fairly healthy, capable and independent, I tend to lose patience when I feel that I am having to adjust MY plans or timetable to help another...even when it really is not costing me anything. I get impatient waiting in lines, being stuck in traffic behind a slower driver or having to patiently wait to get my meal in our buffet line. I need to constantly find ways to reframe these times into something positive rather than more infuriating annoyances.

Here are some ways in which I might do this in even small ways:

• When stuck in traffic, use the opportunity to use the Jesus Prayer.
• Being grateful for my health and independence--and thanking God for that especially when needing to wait behind someone who needs extra help.
• Taking time to notice the beauty of the world around me...something I sometimes miss when I am either rushing around or stressing about having to wait for something.
• Looking for ways that I can help at least one person who needs assistance--even if it's just with a smile or a hug.

How else can I learn patience and compassion for others today?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Following Instructions

The eighth step of humility is that a monk does only what is endorsed by the common rule of the monastery and the example set by his superiors. RB80.7.55

There is a special talent in being able to follow directions and not deviate from the expected norm. I know this from experience since I am not a person who cares to follow instructions all the time and ends up working harder to clean up messes.

I enjoy living on the edge and learning by doing so when given the option of reading the manual or recipe or just "winging it" and hoping for the best. I usually just forge ahead and get ready for an adventure. After all, how many great discoveries would have been lost if everyone followed the guidebooks all the time?

In community life, however, Benedict is inviting me to consider adhering to the basic plan for the group...not to head out on my own taking others with me. Not everyone enjoys an adventure as much as I do and there is prudence in being respectful of other's sensitivities. All of life does not have to be lived by my rules. I need to be willing to bend and accept the norm.

I need to pray for the grace to temper my need for innovation and excitement with other's need for security.

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Stability in the Community

The workshop where we are to toil faithfully at all these tasks is the enclosure of the monastery and stability in the community. RB80.4.78

Chapter 4 of the Rule of Benedict speaks of the Tools of Good Works or as some translators refer to it, The Tools of the Spiritual Craft. We have just finished listing the various tools or skills which are necessary in order to live Christian/monastic life well. It is a list which includes the 10 Commandments, the Golden Rule, the 2 Great Commandments as well as bits of common folk wisdom.

Living a life according to the Tools of Good Works sounds a bit like an ideal at times. After all, there are 78 verses of wisdom contained in this chapter. Who but the most diligent among us can live up to these precepts if not all the time, at least half the time??? I know I can't.

My natural tendency would be to run in the face of such a daunting task. I do not like to fail...so if failure is a possibility (or a sure certainty) I think I will just opt out. But this is about living life fully, I have to at least make the attempt.

Today's passage gives me a glimmer of hope to persevere. It invites me to remain at the task I committed to at the start. It reminds me that although I may not get it perfectly all the time, or even any of the time, all I am asked to do is to remain faithful to the life I chose when I said yes to the monastic life. I don't have to get it right, I just have to keep trying with everyone else.

How am I using the tools of good works in my life today?

Sr. Catherine

Hospitality--Accepting All as Christ

Great care and concern are to be shown in receiving poor people and pilgrims, because in them more particularly Christ is received; our very awe of the rich guarantees them special respect. RB80.53.15

Hospitality is one of the monastic values that I took to quite easily as a young Sister. Afterall, I am an extrovert and enjoy spending time visiting with people and making them feel comfortable. In my time in community, I have had various opportunities to practice hospitality and to gain deeper insight into its meaning.

For about 7 years, I was fortunate to work at a social service agency that emphasized the dignity of all people and encouraged all to treat others with equal respect--whether client, staff, volunteer, etc. During my years there I made it a point to try to connect with as many of the regular clients and volunteers as I could. I would try to remember something specific about the person as well we their name. When I saw these people coming to our offices, I made it a point to ask them about whatever was significant about them. Many were amazed that I would recall facts about their lives. For me, it just seemed part of the ministry of hospitality--meeting Christ in the other, no matter what the disguise. I have continued to carry on this habit in my personal life.

How is Christ coming to me today? Who does Christ look like? How can I best respond to Christ in my life?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Mixing the Generations

What happens when you get people from different generations interacting with one another? What teenager or young adult would find it interesting to spend an evening praying, eating and sharing with religious women and seminarians? These were questions that surfaced in my mind when I was approached by members of the vocations committee for the Church of St. Benedict in Broken Arrow, OK.

Last evening, our community joined with this parish in hosting a Seminarian and Sisters Summer Social which included evening prayer, dinner, games and prizes. Everyone had an opportunity to make new friends and to visit with one another.

Our community was able to show our hospitality in various ways including sharing in an informal interview game that showed how diverse our Sisters are in their interests and personalities.

Benedict envisioned a community that would embrace the old and the young, the weak and the strong, the healthy and the ill. In our day, it is our task to give a face to that spirituality and to Gospel living.

How have I shown God's hospitality to others today?

Sr. Catherine, OSB

A Kind Word--The Best Gift

Above all, let him be humble. If goods are not available to meet a request, he will offer a kind word in reply, for it is written: A kind word is better than the best gift (Sir 18:17). (RB80.31.13-14)

Benedict realizes that the requests made to the cellarer might not always be able to be fulfilled. Rather than have the person say "no" angrily or with disdain, the person is asked to respond with a kind word or maybe even an alternative solution to the request. The concern here is that the person asking would feel that they are being heard and their need respected. There are times when a request might come at an inappropriate time or at a time of lack or scarcity.

Isn't it better to hear, "I understand your need and it will be addressed as soon as possible." rather than, "Why would you ask for that when you know that it is not available."? Many times a person might be needing someone to recognize their need and to help come up with alternatives rather than a plain no.

Benedict points out again that in all types of communal situations, it is the relationships (respect, dignity, communication) among the members that is more important than the material concerns.

Sr. Catherine, OSB

The Cellarer

As cellarer of the monastery, there should be chosen from the community someone who is wise, mature in conduct, temperate, not an excessive eater, not proud, excitable, offensive, dilatory or wasteful, but God-fearing, and like a father to the whole community. He will take care of everything, but will do nothing without an order from the abbot. Let him keep to his orders.
He should not annoy the brothers. If any brother happens to make an unreasonable demand of him, he should not reject him with disdain and cause him distress, but reasonably and humbly deny the improper request. Let him keep watch over his own soul, ever mindful of that saying of the Apostle: He who serves well secures a good standing for himself (1 Tim 3:13). He must show every care and concern for the sick, children, guests and the poor, knowing for certain that he will be held accountable for all of them on the day of judgment. He will regard all utensils and goods of the monastery as sacred vessels of the altar, aware that nothing is to be neglected. He should not be prone to greed, nor be wasteful and extravagant with the goods of the monastery, but should do everything with moderation and according to the abbot’s orders. (RB80.31.1-12)

Benedict provides us today with the qualities required of the monastery cellarer. Every group has a "cellarer" of sorts...just under a different guise. Families have parents, sports teams have the team manager, work places have HR. There is a need for a person or persons who are the "go to" person on projects, events or activities.

Benedict's ideal person is not excitable, reasonable, kind, considerate and wise. This person has the skill necessary to say no and leave the person feeling as though they received a gift. The superior possesses many qualities that parallel those required for the cellarer. They are so close that the cellarer is warned twice to not do anything that would not be readily endorsed by the leader. There needs to be a trust that whether the superior asks it or one of her assistants ask that the same values and philosophy will be proposed.

The qualities of the cellarer are personal traits that I hope to possess someday. May I remain open to God's voice in my life to accept these qualities when they are offered to me.

Sr. Catherine, OSB

The Right Touch

Every age and level of understanding should receive appropriate treatment. RB80.30.1

Growing up as the oldest in our family, I never really understood why the younger ones always seemed to receive different treatment than I did. I believed in a world of justice and fairness where everyone is treated equally. That all makes lots of sense as long as everyone is identical and all situations are equal. Unfortunately, that is rarely the case.

So...did I seriously want my parents to treat me with as much care as they did my brother who was often sick (and never really got to have much fun)? Did I really want to be protected like my sister who being the youngest probably did need a bit more protection? Do I really want to be held to the same standard as everyone else (even though it might not be as effective for me)? Benedict relied on the wisdom of the superior to be able to discern what was the best approach to deal with each situation.

May I trust leadership enough to handle situations as is wisest.

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Praying the Full Psalter

Above all else we urge that if anyone finds this distribution of the psalms unsatisfactory, he should arrange whatever he judges better, provided that the full complement of one hundred and fifty psalms is by all means carefully maintained every week, and that the series begins anew each Sunday at Vigils. For monks who in a week’s time say less than the full psalter with the customary canticles betray extreme indolence and lack of devotion in their service. We read, after all, that our holy Fathers, energetic as they were, did all this in a single day. Let us hope that we, lukewarm as we are, can achieve it in a whole week. (RB80.18.22-25)

This passage from the end of Chapter 18 of the Rule is reminiscent of the concern many elders have about subsequent generations. Oftentimes, the elders among us lament the fact that the younger generations don't have the same energy, fervor or zeal as they had--sometimes forgetting that the same was said of them 50 or 60 years ago.

There is a sense in reading this passage from the Rule that Benedict is trying to encourage his followers to maintain the fervor, zeal and love for prayer, scripture and lectio that previous generations possessed. He points out that our monastic ancestors in the desert managed to recite the entire psalter in one day--we should at least be able to do this is 7 days.

Benedict is not so much promoting mindless recitation of prayers as he is emphasizing the spirit which needs to be present in disciples. He is promoting us taking the psalms so seriously that in a sense we become a living "scripture" through the continued recitation, prayer and encounter with the sacred texts.

There is a saying that states that I might be the only version of the scripture that others encounter today. What is the message that I am giving others? How am I reflecting God's word to others today?

My Will vs God's Will

The second step of humility is that a man loves not his own will nor takes pleasure in the satisfaction of his desires; rather he shall imitate by his actions that saying of the Lord: I have come not to do my own will, but the will of him who sent me (John 6:38). Similarly we read, "Consent merits punishment; constraint wins a crown." (RB80.7.31-33)

Tenacity, determination, single-mindedness, driven, willful--these are just a few of the terms that can be used as synonyms for STUBBORNNESS. Stubborn is a word that has been used to describe me probably since infancy. I have always known what I wanted things, how I wanted them to be and when I wanted them. When I have my mind and my heart set on a goal or a prize, everyone better stand back because I am determined.

Now how does this will of mine relate to God's will in my life? There are times when my idea of how things should play out and God's will are at odds. What do I do then?

I have slowly learned (and am still learning on a daily basis) to listen for God's voice in my desires. Rather than rush ahead as soon as I think of something, I try to take it to prayer at least a few times before I act on things. This practice allows me to listen to God's will and see where that is leading in relation to my original plan. I do not have it down to a science yet and may not for a long time but there is progress. I also try running my plans by some trusted friends who can often help me see God's plan when I can't.

Sr. Catherine, OSB

Unhesitating Obedience

…they walk according to another’s decisions and directions…(RB80.5.12)

I never seem to stop being amazed and edified at the manner in which some of my sisters accept what the superior asks of them. It is not difficult to accept an assignment in the profession in which you are already trained, but it is most difficult to accept an assignment in a profession for which you are untrained and for which you have no desire to enter. But my friends—Sr Assumpta and Sr Scholastica were asked to do that. They were asked to be teachers. Sr Assumpta wanted to spend time on the farm with the chickens, cows and the garden; Sr Scholastica was a carpenter of sorts and an artist with many talents. But both put aside their concerns and their own will and prepared to be teachers. Both spent some 20+ years in the classroom: Sr Assumpta with 1st graders and Sr Scholastica with art classes. Both are among our most successful and beloved teachers. Sr Assumpta is teaching 1st graders in heaven now, but Sr Scholastica is still among us using her carpentry and artistic talents.

They both “walked according to another’s decisions and directions” and God blessed them and our community for doing so.


Sr. Veronica, OSB

Living with Hope

…never lose hope in God’s mercy. (RB80.4.74)

“Life is an adventure in forgiveness.” (Norman Cousins) On this adventure God’s mercy is always available. But all too often when one door closes and another opens, we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one God has opened for us. All the great spiritual leaders in history were people who forgot the closed door and walked through the open one. Abraham, Moses, Jesus, Mary, Gandhi, Lincoln, Mother Teresa and Nelson Mandella walked through that open door with a promise of “hope in God’s mercy,” and looked toward the future without the need to know exactly what it would look like.

This is the kind of life adventure Benedict asks of us.

Sr.Veronica,OSB

To Love All Equally

Therefore, the abbot is to show equal love to everyone and apply the same discipline to all according to their merits. (RB80.2.22)

When people ask mothers which of their children they love most or is their favorite, mothers will generally reply that they love all the same but for different reasons. Yet all are still loved the same. Never having been a parent I kind of get what this means but I don't really understand.

I know that growing up, I needed the assurance from parents, teachers, coaches that I was doing a good job and that I was loved. I just seemed to crave it more than most. When I did something wrong or disobeyed, even just a look of displeasure was enough to send me into wails of tears and drama. Actually disappointment in me and my behavior was usually the worst punishment.

Benedict, today, invites the superior of the community to love all in equal measure and to discipline according to the situation. One size fits all leadership and discipline will not work--what will not even faze one person might cause another to be tramatized.

Sr. Catherine, OSB

A Good Example Will Do

Furthermore, anyone who receives the name of abbot is to lead his disciples by a twofold teaching: he must point out to them all that is good and holy more by example than by words, proposing the commandments of the Lord to receptive disciples with words, but demonstrating God’s instructions to the stubborn and the dull by a living example. (RB80.2.11-12)

In speaking about leadership, Benedict took into account the strengths and weaknesses of the team members. Some might learn better by looking at the instructions, some by hearing an explanation, some by experimenting on their own, and some by following an example. Benedict warned the superior to be prepared for all types of learners among his disciples; adapting as necessary.

I have found that the best way for me to learn is through experimentation and questioning when stuck. My tendency when finding a new gadget or encountering a problem is to jump in first and start working with what I can figure out. My younger sister, Juli, is an instruction person. She looks at manuals and reads all the directions (even the fine print) before getting started. We both are pretty successful at getting our goals met. So there are benefits to both approaches.

Benedict invites the leader to use instruction for some and a good, lived example for those that need it. That way more will understand what is taught.

I pray that I will remember to be both an example and an instructor for others through my life.

Sr. Catherine, OSB